Saturday, March 17, 2012

Where's the Little Gold Ring You Wear on Your Hand?

I used to not wear my wedding band. I didn't not wear it because I was unhappy, though; actually, at the time when I didn't wear it, I was probably happy more than not. People would ask me why I didn't wear it, and my answer would always be the same. I know I'm married, I'd say. I don't need a ring. And it was true. I didn't need a ring to remind me.

Since Glenn and I got back together after the Incident of '09, I've worn my wedding band every single day. Things have been different since then, and I definitely haven't felt secure enough in my marriage to not have it on. I know that probably makes the kind of sense that's not, and I'd love to clarify it for you, but I can't. All I can say is that for the past few years, wearing my ring has just seemed more important than it did in the past. Even since we decided whatever it is we decided almost 2 weeks ago, I've worn it every day (unlike Glenn, whose wedding band has been sitting in the same spot on our dresser for what I guess must be 13 days now). At this point, my finger feels funny if I'm not wearing my ring.

While on a mad cleaning spree today (which for me pretty much means throwing away everything I don't absolutely need), I found a ring I bought in Disney World almost 20 years ago from a guy who custom made rings somewhere in Adventureland right near The Pirates of the Caribbean ride. It's a silver ring that says KEL, and it just happens to be the same size as my left ring finger.

People wear wedding rings on the left ring finger because it was believed that the vein in that finger led directly to the heart, making the ring a symbol of love. If I'm going to make it through this, the person I need to love the most is me.

My wedding ring is on the dresser.

1 comment:

  1. Says a lot that you are finally putting yourself first, on your finger and hopefully your life.